I have always been known for
being optimistic, or as I have often said myself, unrealistically optimistic in
spite of reality. Hope was the one thing I could always cling to when things
got tough. I think I learned very young, after the suicide of a family member,
that your life was going to be whatever you made it and that giving up was far
more painful for those you left behind than you could ever imagine in your
temporary moment of despair.
This isn’t always easy. Some days
things just seem to pile up. Some days I just feel old, past my prime and I
wonder what the years ahead hold for me. It’s hard not to feel down, especially
when the news lately has been filled with so much heartache, so much suffering.
Of course, the news has always been filled with heartache and suffering hasn’t
it?
We forget sometimes though, as we
look back at “the good old days” that memory seems to cloud over the bad and
focus on the good, both in our personal lives and in our memory as a country.
There were other years when jobs were hard to find, when education was
inaccessible to many of our citizens and when discrimination was rampant. We
have to remember, that while television and movies can make past generations
look romantic and wonderful, there was also much suffering, not so unlike
today.
The same is true when we look
back at our own lives, sometimes longingly, to the past. There were good times
then but also struggles and we have to remember how far we’ve come and how much
we’ve survived. One thing I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older is that you never
come to a time in your life when you can say “okay, everything is perfect now.”
There will always be challenges. There will always be illness, and struggles.
There will be divorce and unemployment. The key, for me, is to not get
discouraged by this, as maddening as it can be. We are human. We live in a
world with other humans. Things will never be perfect. They can, however,
always be made better. This is the example I have tried to set for my children.
That you don’t give up, you survive, no matter what. No matter how hard it is,
you get up every day, put your two feet on the floor, and keep on going.
I put this to practice a few
months ago, after a routine mammogram (talk about feeling old). I was called
back for more tests because they spotted “something of concern.” I, of course,
freaked out! Then I stopped, took a deep breath and made a decision on how I
was going to face this, whatever it turned out to be. Damn it, I was going to
do it with dignity! So, I showed up at my scheduled tests in bright red high
heels. Now this may seem silly, but it was my way of bringing attitude to the
situation! I was not going to let it drag me down, I was going to face it head
on and I did! It all turned out well in the end but during those tests I never
took off my red heels. Focusing on them reminded me of my own power to get
through whatever life throws at me.
We can’t get bogged down by the
suffering, or give up because the fight has taken too long. We must keep
moving; keep going, always, always, always!
A beautiful example of this was a
story in this week’s news about Pete Seeger. If you are young enough not to
know Pete Seeger, I urge you to Google him the minute you finish reading my
blog! He is an extraordinary musician and social activist. At 92 years old, if
anyone deserves to be discouraged and to give up, it would be him. If anyone
deserves to rest on his accomplishments if would be him. Yet, here he was this
week, Occupying Wall Street!
Another article I found recently
was about Elena Salvoni, a woman in her 90s who lives in London and oh by the
way, just retired again from her career as a Maitre d. She retired at 65, tried
again at 75 and then worked until she was 90. Why, because she loved her work
and those she worked with loved her. Now Elena may not be as famous as Pete
Seeger but she has walked her path with pride and dignity. Who knows how
many people’s lives she may have changed with her hard work and positive
example!
Elena and Pete are proof that you
can have a vital, productive life well after the typical retirement age of
sixty five. In fact, maintaining a productive life is what keeps people
going. Retiring and sitting around doing nothing is actually bad for you! Study
after study has found that the key to living a long, healthy life is not
necessarily how much you exercise or what you eat. The key to living a long
healthy life is to keep active, keep moving, and to keep doing! The secret to a
long, active life is your ATTITUDE! How do you handle the inevitable challenges
of life? Can you keep going, can you bounce back?
So today, I’m going to keep
moving, keep showing up! I’m going to “keep on keeping on” and I’m packing my attitude,
so watch out! Now I don’t know what Elena and Pete have been wearing for shoes
lately, but I think I’ll go shopping for a second pair of bright red heels,
just in case!
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it,
change your attitude." Maya Angelou
Want to read more ~
This piece was originally published on the Bangor Daily News website, October 22, 2011.
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